In this very moment, I feel a strong urge to share with ALL of you my current process. Before I get started, I want to acknowledge the Light Beings who are such Celestial reflections of LOVE and Let me know that I AM healing and WILL overcome my egoic barriers! Tahira West, Aaza Arabelle Clitandre-Berhanu, Chibale Sres Feaster, Tasiya Elohimstress, Shereece Holmes, Anika Lani, Deon, Tzaddi Allick, COLM, Crystal Purple Lotus Energy and my most direct teachers who I don't always want to acknowledge Azza Bee, Earth Mom, Tamera, Claudette, Malesa, Sean, as well as countless beings that have and will continue to come into my life.
I WILL return back to creating because I TRULY LOVE to do it and NOT because I HAVE to (according to the illusions of the ego) make money to survive in this world. First of ALL I AM not from this world nor AM I OF it. And though I know this, and the right thing to do, I don't always do it! Whenever I feel confused, frustrated with myself, (for not doing or being), irritated, overwhelmed, it's because I'm separating from my source, BUT MOST of ALL it's because I BELIEVE or think that I have to do this on my own. I have to fix myself on my own. I have to do the right thing on my own, Listen to that voice on my own with NO assistance or guidance. OF COURSE I need guidance, and I can't Do it on my own. The listening, being , doing requires assistance from a HIGHER REALM, a Euphoric PLACE of PEACE... Holy Spirit is the assistance that I need and call on to help me. Though she cannot interfere with my will, she can redirect my vision, and sight to God's and it's WILL.
I wrote in an earlier post how my ego knows that I AM going to win, and AM undoing the 35 years of conditioning from a stagnant belief in the false, the untrue. This world as we are living it and experiencing it now is INSANE! and this is because we have, I HAVE given up my power to my ego for so long. The ego does not care about true happiness and true happiness cannot really be explained but felt and experienced. Anything that feels good in this world from the aspect of ego is a temporary feeling and it is UNREAL!
The split mind I've experienced tells me that it is real, because my body feels the repercussions of it. If I AM successful as I've deemed it from the world then my body feels good, happy, and everything seems to BE flowing because I have money to enjoy the material manifestations in this world. However, what is missing is the fact that I could have material success and still BE... depressed, discouraged, sabotaging etc. If I AM not healing the split mind of accolade, through possession then guess what? my ego will find something else for my mind to complain about.
My mind has been split for a long time and in this current moment I realize that this is why I AM Not experiencing life and walking with the Colossal entitlement I innately have as an extension of GOD. I AM not walking through this world with real vision. I AM not creating my masterpiece as God extension. Our wills are powerful and we have the same abilities to create as God. For me, my creativity became fuzzy the minute I relinquish ALL of my trust in a system that has NO S-U-S-T-A-I-N-A-B-I-L-I-T-Y. More importantly, I expect because I KNOW what I KNOW, for it to BE healed instantly. There's a vigilant diligence that this step requires, which shows itself in many intangible forms. Breathing, Meditation-Visualization, Affirmations, and other transcendental experiences.
What's coming to me in this second is that I NO LONGER want to BE... a slave to paper, to Illusions. 2012 is the year of the 6th Chakra Insightful Innuendos, Clarity, Creation, Love, and MIND! Everything is shifting from illusions and exposure of the Truth, of Light, of Love is coming forward. Just go through a mental review of the worldly discoveries in Governments across the globe, scandals revealed, etc.
After that insight, I also realize that part of my sabotaging hiccup has a lot to do with FEAR! I have created All of these OLD STALE beliefs that create my anxiety and makes me actually AFRAID of succeeding. It makes me feel overwhelmed about succeeding from God's Will. ABSURD I know! Because as I get quiet and begin listening to the Voice of Spirit and God, I also realize how EXPANSIVE I AM and what I was created to GIVE, DO, BE! I'm not just Omena El, mother, sister, friend, daughter, girlfriend, African woman, from Brooklyn, Bright, creative, spicy, loving ( sometimes), embracing (sometimes), phenomenal dancer, writer, Holistic Healer, doubtful (sometimes), confident (sometimes), powerful (sometimes) etc. I AM That I AM... God Consciousness, A Direct Link to my LIMITLESS, BOUNDLESS Mother/Father GOD! and important piece to the completion and One MIND Awareness of HUMANITY as Light Creators! Our true HOME lies deep within the astral spectrum's of light. I WANT TO RETURN HOME! I WANT TO RETURN TO WHOLENESS/HOLINESS!
Thank you Light beings fore-mentioned for inspiring DRIVE and giving me the Keys to unlock my own mysteries and DIVINITY to accomplish this. I AM aware that I have projected you into my existence to remind me of this very jewel of truth! Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You!.......................................................................................................................................................
Not Death, Hierarchy, Man's Laws, Chaos, Confusion, Fear, Illusion
Thank You for Listening and Reading
I Love You
Until the NEXT DISCOVERY
Omena El, CHC
The Holistic Alchemist